On average, a young infant (under 3 months of age) cries for 3 hours a day. Believe it or not that is average. So there are many infants that cry for longer periods each day. It’s important to have support so you can get a break. Another way to survive this time is to wear your baby in a comfortable baby sling. It helps with crying because young infants like to be held alot. They like the security of being close to mom or dad, feeling your warmth, your heart beat, the rhythm of your breathing. If you have heard of babywearing (wearing your baby in a sling) and haven’t tried it yet–don’t wait any longer. Once you’re past the fussy period of your baby’s life you will have acquired your babywearing skills and enjoy the experience for months if not years!
Calming a crying baby
November 7th, 2009Healthy Attachment
November 6th, 2009Did you realize that the process of bonding with your baby and creating a secure attachment would influence your baby’s success in life? Well, developmental experts tell us that when a baby has bonded nicely with his or her caregivers it builds trust in relationships and an ability to connect with other people. In Dr. Stanley Greenspan’s book Great Kids he says, “Throughout her life, a child must be able to ‘read’ and relate to a range of people. As she grows up, this ability to connect will allow her to make friends and form a variety of relationships with significant loved ones, with casual acquaintances, and with colleagues and clients. In times of stress, she will turn to those close to her to help her feel better and find solutions to problems. Through connections with others, children and adults share the pleasures, joys, angers and sorrows of their lives.” So bonding with your child is important, not only to feel safe and secure as an infant and child but also to form healthy, successful relationships as an adult. The lessons of engagement start with the intimacy of an infant’s bonds with his or her parents. So how do you “bond”? Well, it’s a process and doesn’t necessarily start with one magical moment. If you read some of our other posts you can get more details about fostering a bond with your baby. In summary, here’s what you can do:
1. Talking
2. Playing (games like peek-a-boo, my kids are 2 years and 4 years now and still enjoy peek-a-boo!)
3. Reading (even to young infants)
4. Holding, caressing, infant massage, babywearing (the practice of wearing your baby in a baby sling)
Have you heard of the 4th trimester?
November 6th, 2009It’s an idea used by pediatrician Dr. Harvey Karp to describe what newborns are like for the first 3 months after they are born and what soothes them. When a baby is born he or she will often be comforted and consoled by things parents or other caregivers do that emulate what it was like in the womb. For example, a tight swaddle is often soothing to a newborn. Maternity nurses are experts at swaddling. Maybe that’s why babies are frequently sleeping quietly in the newborn nursery despite lights and noise. They are usually tightly swaddled. Being tightly held is like being confined in the uterus. Wearing a baby in a baby carrier, pouch, or sling can do the same thing because it surrounds and conforms to the baby’s body. Since mom or dad is often carrying the baby around there’s the added advantage of motion which can lull the baby. You can hold your new baby all the time or you can “wear” him or her in any number of baby slings available on the market.
Advantages of babywearing
November 6th, 2009Many parents end up using a car seat carrier for holding their baby. It’s a great convenience but very limiting for the baby and he or she losses out on so many advantages of being closer to mom and dad. Once a caregiver gets used to a sling-type carrier (which can take time) it’s so much better for everyone. Here are some advantages of babywearing:
1) the child feels the warmth of the mother or father
2) the baby feels and hears the parent’s heart beat and voice
3) the baby smells the parent’s scent
4) it mimicks the womb making the baby feel calm and secure
5) the parent’s motion can lull the child to sleep.
In addition to freeing up the parent’s hands wearing one’s baby in a fabric baby sling distributes baby’s weight more evenly across a parent’s back. It’s better for baby and better for mom and dad. Baby slings typically come with instuctional DVDs which can help a caregiver learn how to use one.
Bonding with your baby builds brain.
November 6th, 2009Babies are born to connect. Scientists are now starting to understand why warm, reponsive early care helps infants thrive. It turns out that bonding or attachment is one of the most important factors in development. If a child feels secure that his physical and emotional needs will be met then he can use his energy to work on other areas of brain development. In BrightFrom the Start, Jill Stamm writes “What sounds simply warm and fuzzy creates demonstrable changes in the brain and nervous system. Emotion affects attention…and attention, in turn, affects learning. How secure a baby feels therefore influences all the development that follows.” Bonding is not one event. It is the ongoing experience of attachment that forms between parent and child. You don’t need to do anything extraordinary in order to have healthy attachment.
In general, the things that foster bonding and attachment come naturally to parents such as smiling, talking to your baby, holding, soothing, and responding to his or her needs. Babywearing is a nice way to have baby close. You can’t spoil a baby by holding him too much, especially newborns. Other things you can do to develop a bond with your baby are as follows: 1. Infant massage. There are a number of studies that have documented the benefits of infant massage. It’s easy to learn and there are plenty of videos/DVDs on the market to teach you. 2. Respond quickly and predictably to infant’s cries. 3. Establish consistent routines for such activites as feeding, sleeping and bathing. 4. Slow activity down periodically (less rushing, calm atmosphere).
Babywearing is smart.
November 6th, 2009Wearing your baby in a baby wrap carrier or sling is smart. Not only is smart for mom or dad because of its convenience and ergonomic design but also it helps your baby become smart. Babies who are worn in a sling or a wrap learn more. Brain growth is enhanced by environmental experiences. The nerves in the brain branch out and make connections with other nerves. This process is optimized when you wear your baby because babies are more content. They spend more time in the state of quiet alertness so their energy and attention are directed toward taking in the environmental experiences around them. This builds brain. Babywearing is the best.
Why wear your baby?
November 6th, 2009Research has proven the many benefits of babywearing. Babies cry up to 40-50% less when held.
They often nurse better, and gain weight better. Being held enables mom or other caregiver to notice their baby’s feeding cues earlier and before crying starts, as crying is a late cue for hunger in babies. And if you are able to start a feed before the baby is crying frantically usually the feeding goes better.
Babies who are often called colicky or fussy often do better if the time they are carried is increased. The rocking motion and the tight swaddle effect of some carriers is just what they like.
Dads and other caregivers can also promote bonding with baby through holding and provide comfort to baby when mom needs a break. This can be done with a baby sling if dads take the babies out for a given period.
Keeps them safe. Since they are held in your personal space strangers are less likely to touch baby and this can be great during cold and flu season and for spreading germs. You also always know where they are– which is great for toddlers!
Babywearing is more than a trend
November 6th, 2009In many cultures throughout the world, especially Asian cultures, wearing your child on your front, hip, or back is part of every day life. People now realize how good it is for your baby. It sooths and builds the infant-parent bond. Parents might not realize how important it is for a child’s development to feel safe and loved. When a child’s needs are met, such as being held, touched, feeling the warmth of a parent’s body and the pounding of a parent’s heart, a child can trust. This gives the child an opportunity to move on to explore his or her environment and learn about the world. Therefore it sets the stage for life-long learning. So wearing your baby in a baby sling is more than a trend or a convenience (though it is both of those) it’s a tool for bonding and development.
Back to basics
November 6th, 2009The basics in caring for a baby are really quite simple. Meet their physical needs by feeding, changing, bathing, picking them up when they are crying and holding them. This gives them the security that they are safe in the world and that they will be responded to when they speak up (i.e. cry). Meet their emotional and social needs by talking to them, singing, explaining what you are doing as you move through your day together, smiling, playing together and reading. It’s never too early to start reading. Babies will learn the sounds of their native language as you read to them and talk to them.
One of the things that can be quite demanding especially in the beginning when babies are very young is wanting to be held. And any time a child isn’t feeling good whether it’s due to illness or teething they want to be held alot. Investing in a good baby sling has big payoffs. It makes it easier on the caregiver to wear the child and meets the child’s need to be held.
One thing you can feel good about.
November 6th, 2009Once you enter the wonderful realm of parenthood there is as much to feel guilty about as there is to feel good about and vice versa. This is especially true when you get a chance to look back on the early months and years. Young children want to be held alot and in general parents want to hold them but then how do you even make a sandwich for yourself! Holding your child is a natural desire and some babies demand it more from their parents than others but there’s an easy solution. Learn how to wear your child in an infant sling. Many women make it look easy. You may see them on the street or in the library wearing their child effortlessly (many young babies love to sleep in the sling or a woman can discreetly nurse her child in the sling). It becomes even more helpful when you have a toddler or preschooler to chase after at the same time. All in all you really can make many moments special by wearing your child this way. Keeping him or her close, feeling the rhythm of each others’ breaths and heart beats. It may take some practice and getting used to but it’s one thing you can feel good about.